“You’re always all up in my face with that Aquafina Betsy! I’m not thirsty. I don’t want quenching sensations right now.” Fred was angry at Betsy for shoving Aquafina in his face during their mouth breathing hour of television watching.

“Well, Fred I’m just trying to be helpful. It looks so dry in there. You’re gonna get sandpaper tongue,” Betsy said. She was such a sweet old lady always caring about Fred and his orifices.

“I’m tired of your heart being so big. Can we do a reverse Grinch on you?” Fred asked curiously.

“I don’t think so, honey. Here take a shot of Aquafina off my old lady cleavage. It tastes better,” said Betsy. Fred did and it tasted like moth balls and cock socks.

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