“Hey can you keep it down I’m on the telephone!” Harry yelled.
“Sir, you called me,” the operator replied.
“Not again!” he cried and slammed down the phone.
Jan and Betty sat in their cubicles staring at Harry.
“I have a feeling Harry has to take a massive shit,” Jan said to Betty.
“What makes you say that?” Betty asked.
“Well, he’s just acting so weird. Like how a giant asshole would act if it had to take a massive shit,” Jan explained.
“Do you think we should entice him to shit so he stops acting weird?” Betty asked.
“I think so,” said Jan.
Betty sent an email to Harry with pictures of people sitting on the toilet making different facial expressions. Harry looked at the message and then looked over at Betty with a confused look on his face. Betty gave him a head nod as if to say, “It’s all good. Poop it out brother.”
Jan and Betty walked over to Harry’s cubicle and began making farting noises with their mouths. Harry tried to ignore them but finally asked, “What are you girls doing?”
“Oh were just stretching our legs,” Betty said.
Jan dropped a pencil on the floor and said, “Silly me. How can I write if my utensil is all the way down there?”
Jan proceeded to bend over really slow in front of Harry.
“That’s some ass you have there Jan,” Betty said.
“I know I can shit for days with this ass,” Jan replied.
“Look at that Harry. Can you imagine how great it would feel to be that ass when shit comes flying out of it?” Betty asked Harry.
“You sound like my mom,” Harry said.
Jan stood up surprised Harry didn’t have to shit yet. She still had one last trick. Jan pulled a Slap Chop out of her vagina and chopped up an onion while simultaneously removing the peel. Upon witnessing this amazing feat Harry immediately shat himself and politely asked Jan, “Would you mind handing me a tissue?”


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