Ben was arguing with the director at the art gallery yelling, “Why doesn’t it smell in here?”

“Excuse me? I’m not sure what you mean,” the art director said.

Ben started sniffing very loudly and said, “I thought this was a fart gallery! I expected it to smell like one!”

“It’s an art gallery sir. Not a fart gallery,” replied the director.

Ben turned to his girlfriend and asked, “Did you know about this? You told me we were going to a fart gallery.”

“Well I know it’s not what we hoped for, but maybe since we’re here we could check it out?” she said.

Ben’s face was turning red with anger, “No! No! Absolutely not. A fart can be art but art can never be a fart.”

“That doesn’t even make sense,” his girlfriend said.

“Of all people I thought you would understand,” Ben said.

The director thought it was a good time to interject and said, “I would be happy to give you a guided tour of our wonderful exhibits.”

“Eat my nards!” Ben requested.

“I would love a tour,” his girlfriend stated.

Ben was not happy with his lady’s dissent and asked her, “What are you one of them now? What are you some kind of art turd now?”

She stood closer to the art director and said, “Maybe I’m just tired of going to fart galleries all the time. A girl like me needs some excitement and culture. Life isn’t all about farts. I’m a classy lady and I need to be treated like one.”

“More like a gassy lady and you know it,” Ben said.

“Well, I’ve grown up a lot since we’ve been here,” his girlfriend told him.

“Know what? Screw you Ben’s girlfriend!” Ben said.

“That’s all I ever was to you was Ben’s girlfriend,” she said.

“Yea? Well guess what?” Ben asked.

“What?” she replied

And then Ben farted. His girlfriend made a pouty face and asked sincerely, “Did you mean that?”

Ben spoke softly, “Well, yeah. I think I did,” as he slowly looked up at her with his sad puppy dog eyes.

Making eye contact his girlfriend said, “Get over here you silly butt farter.”

They embraced each other in their arms and she said, “Let’s go find us a real fart gallery.”

“That sounds wonderful,” Ben said.

As they were making their way out of the art gallery his girlfriend asked, “You didn’t shit yourself back there did you?”


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